Meet the Family - Part 2: Dad

It’s time for Part 2 of Meet the Family. This time up is Dad (or Mike or Grandpa). I have to be careful writing this because I fear it will be too easy to make fun of him the whole time. I must keep reminding myself that he is paying for most of this and therefore I should try to be a little nice. Notice the word “little.”

Isn’t he quite the dashing gentlemen (snicker, snicker). I love the sideburns. And that belt buckle, I remember that from many years ago. And though I should not speak ill of the deceased, what is going on with Mom’s pants? Those are just really something else. Click here to see the whole picture - Dad, Mom, Grandma, and Grandpa on the QE2!

According to Dad, he’s been on 5 cruises in his lifetime - 3 to the Caribbean as an adult, 1 to Bermuda when he was only 15, and a Mediterranean-type cruise when he was 18. On that cruise, he visited Naples, Haifa, Venice, and the Greek Isles, among other places. I guess that was some type of graduation gift or something like that. I don’t even want to share what I got as a graduation gift from high school. But I will share that it was STOLEN when my home was robbed. Not that I’m still bitter about that or anything. Oh wait, this is about Dad, back on topic. Dad has cruised on the QE2 - I must admit this makes me jealous…

I asked him what he was looking forward to most about this trip. There were lots of possibilities for fun answers - throwing David overboard, gorging himself on unlimited food, visiting the site of his favorite “Bridge to Nowhere,” etc. But he had to get all serious in his response, instead. He claims, and I believe him for what it’s worth, that he most looking forward spending time with the family and creating a “shared experience that we will all remember.” Well, almost all of us. I think Sophie might be a little young. And Dad himself is getting up there in years, he might not remember the details. This is the man who got my age wrong on my birthday cake. He can blame David for that one all he wants, but that’s not going to help. Oops, back to Dad again. I’m really bad at this.

I also asked him about which part he was most excited to see/experience - the train trip, the cruise itself, or the time in Denali. Like a true politician, he couldn’t give me a straight answer. He was looking forward to all three. How non-committal of him. He did mention he was looking forward to taking the train through Fairfield, Iowa, where he spent his college years at Parsons College. I think that will be the only thing to look forward to in Iowa unless you are a connoisseur of corn fields. Which I am not.

Speaking from personal experience, I know that this is a trip that he has been talking about for a very, very long time and is very excited about (as can be evidenced from THE MAP). On behalf of everyone else, we are all very grateful to Dad for making this trip a reality and even though we may gripe about his crazy map and itinerary, we really do appreciate all of this. But I can’t be sappy for any longer, I much prefer sarcasm.

Thinking I wasn’t going to have enough to write, I asked Dad the questions that are asked of celebrities at the end of Inside the Actor’s Studio. Most of answers weren’t all that exciting, but I do want point out one response. When asked what his least favorite word is, he replied “nuptials.” At first, this seems like a very strange response, but upon further discussion, he told me that a certain other relative of ours, one I will not name for that person’s protection, has apparently always thought that this word just sounds dirty. Apparently, so does Dad.

Finally, when asked if he wanted me to include anything else, he thought I should add the same thing at the end of my bio, though he used the words “cute and single.” In fact, I never claimed I was cute. I certainly don’t think that would be an appropriate word this time around, either.

Up next is David, stay tuned!